Difficult conversations

Preparing and practicing a response plan to workplace violence is crucial in every industry, experts say.

Talking with workers is something just about all safety professionals do every day.

Some conversations, though, can be harder than others.

“A difficult conversation is any conversation that you personally feel challenged by, for whatever reasons,” said Roberta Matuson, a Boston-based author, consultant and executive coach.

Talking with workers about safety can stir emotions and induce anxiety for both the safety pro and the employees, but it’s a necessary part of preventing injuries.

So, what can you as a safety pro do to make these conversations easier for everyone involved and reach an agreement on the outcome you’re seeking? Here’s advice from Matuson and other experts.

Break down barriers

The reasons why difficult conversations don’t happen in the workplace are plentiful, the experts say.

Deadlines or production pressures may be a bigger priority, or employees may become defensive when asked about safety.

It could also boil down to conflict avoidance among safety pros. “The person initiating the conversation doesn’t know how to talk about it and may have inadequate communication skills,” said David Consider, a senior safety consultant at the National Safety Council. “Or we want to be liked and supported by others and don’t want to be viewed as the ‘safety cop.’ Sometimes, we just get frustrated and tired of explaining ourselves.”

If these conversations don’t take place, however, workers’ health and safety may be at stake.

Matuson, author of “Can We Talk? Seven Principles for Managing Difficult Conversations at Work,” is a proponent of having difficult conversations on a regular basis.

“What happens when we only have that conversation once a year during your annual review? People are surprised,” she said. “Why wouldn’t we have these conversations as part of everyday life? If you do that, it will be easier when you have to have those conversations, because they’re not a surprise.”

Added Consider: “It’s part of a healthy discussion. All of the usual suspects – increased production, quality, morale and revenue, and decreases in overall incidents and events – are benefits.”

Conduct a strategy session

Before initiating the conversation, understand that employees “aren’t choosing to get hurt on the job,” said Leigh Manning, senior safety management consultant at SAIF – a nonprofit workers’ compensation insurance company based in Oregon. “It could be they don’t know the reasons why we do things a certain way, which might point to a need for improved training.”

Her advice: “Go into the discussion with no preconceived ideas or feeling like you already know what needs to happen. This allows workers to fully share their experiences and perspectives.”

Consider recommends scheduling enough time for the conversation and choosing a private space with minimal distractions to “avoid the chances of being overheard or embarrassing the other person.”

How to handle the conversation

OSHA, through its Safe+Sound program, recognizes that difficult conversations regarding workplace safety have the potential to become emotional and contentious, but emphasizes that they’re vital.

Ensure the conversations are successful by following these tips from Matuson, Consider and Manning:

Start small: To prevent the worker from feeling as though they’re being ganged up on, “it’s best at first to have a one-on-one, face-to-face conversation,” Consider said. “If the unsafe behavior continues or doesn’t improve, then you may want to consider a conversation with that person’s direct report or boss so they can work together.”

Be respectful: When speaking with a worker who says they’ve always worked a certain way, recognize their contributions before explaining the situation. “I respect that you’ve been in this role for 30 years,” Matuson said, as an example. “As you can imagine, there are new things coming up every day, new techniques.” Don’t criticize or reprimand the worker; instead, listen carefully to their explanations.

Keep emotions in check: Difficult conversations can, at times, become emotionally charged. Matuson suggests taking a step back if that occurs. “Sometimes you have to take a pause. I don’t think you can plow through while the person on the other side is literally breaking down, they’re in tears. They’re not hearing you.” Acknowledge the person’s emotions, stop the meeting and plan to reschedule for a different day.

Take notes: This will keep the process organized and ensure everybody involved understands the issue and next steps.

Offer takeaways: Consider stressed the importance of leaving a worker with a behavior that’s expected of them, explaining the benefits that can come from it and asking for their commitment to – and understanding of – the behavior.

Focus on one goal: By the end of the talk, “you should have a mutually agreed upon course of action, and both parties should feel good about the conversation,” Manning said.

Don’t fret: Matuson says to not overly worry about difficult conversations. “We tend to make them harder than they are. When we finally do them, we’re like, ‘Oh my gosh, that wasn’t so bad.’ Get it done and move on because they’re going to take up so much space in your brain.”

If you dread the idea of these conversations, Matuson suggested hiring a coach. “Look for someone who can help you work through this so you can take this baggage off the train and travel more lightly.”

Follow up

“The biggest misnomer about these difficult conversations is that they’re one and done,” Matuson said. “They’re never one and done.”

The follow-up process should include checking in to observe and compliment the employee for making the changes that were requested, smoothing things over and, if necessary, making additional adjustments.

“This is a series of conversations,” Matuson said. “You need to be prepared.”

Consider suggested using “the rule of three” – meeting later in the week after the initial conversation, one month later and then again three months later.

Following up also keeps lines of communication open “to avoid unresolved tensions,” he said.

As challenging as some workplace conversations can be, having them can lead to several benefits. Not only does it allow a worker to adjust their unsafe behavior, but it also creates a greater understanding of each other.

“These conversations can demonstrate caring and respect, which ultimately improves workplace morale,” Manning said. “Because we’re all different, there will always be a need to have difficult conversations, but being focused on learning and safety, instead of being right, creates a workplace where individuals are comfortable expressing opinions and working together to continuously improve.”